its been a while

well i believe an apology is in order, see i haven't posted a single thought in about 3 years....but thats all about to change........

it is done

well i did it and im thrilled....lasik , yes i went under the "laser". It was all so surreal. today being the one week anniversary i suppose its time to document the event. Arriving at the lasik place i was not at all nervous, i knew this was the right thing to do and im blessed to be able to afford doing it. After another eye exam, i left my glasses with Preston and was lead to the back because lets face it i am or now i can say was...blind as bat...i almost said ray charles but that would not be a fair comparison,i have one step kid and he fathered dozens of kids from dozens of ladies....after taking a vallium the nurse lady asked if i wanted some benedryl to speed up the pill......REALLY!!!....how wierd...i said no im good and she proceeded to fit me with what i think was a shower cap, (still cant see)...and smeared stuff around my eyes. I sat with some other fools who were groggy and we all waited for our turn. We started to chit chat about things ..joking....and one of the guys started telling us why he was there....apparently it was annoying to him to watch his high def tv sports and not see the scores and info in those small boxes on the screen. I thought Really? i could barely make him out sitting across from me ....and he was complaining about sports boxes? I have never been able to wake up and see right off without blindly reaching for my specs.or forbid my glasses should break id be helpless lost in a sea of fog..hell ive never been able to see while swimmimg or see myself in the shower!!!...and this guy just wanted his pet peeve taken care of.....
So some guy called me in...again it could have been anybody i couldnt tell....and i layed down on this table by some sort of machine. Then the doctor came and talked to me while he flooded my eyes with an anesthetic, the fun was about to begin........

friday is the big day

lasik!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..more to come

wow the damage

since the first episode i was hooked.....woman running through the street with blood all over her

in a trenchcoat..HOW!!! WHY!!!!....it grabbed me and never let go .....the drama!....THE TWISTS.....Turns....BETRAYAL!...holy moses ... Glen Close deserves an emmy in what was an unbelievable performance as Patty Hewes. Another amazing FX drama ....i cant wait till the dvd's.

oh young people

i remember a time when that's all i did was complain about old people.....and actually i still do , but that's besides the point. Theres this young person i know who has become a good friend of mine despite the obvious age difference......I'm actually double his age..and yes before you call chris hanson of nbc i can assure you I'm more mentor and friend than anything else. For me its an actual learning experience to know someone at a time when they see themselves as an all knowing, indestructible super person. It's amusing...i remember being there at that time, and to some extent i still am..yep i haven't moved on from my adolescence yet but i will eventually when it works to my advantage..yes control freak. But this person..lets call him A......( oh I'm in such deep doodoo if this is read).......reminds me, sometimes daily, to see things from a different angle..something i think most people lose the older they get. I don't know why this happens..i think its a settling that occurs ...when your young soo much goes on that's new, high school , college, relationships, friendships...all these things that are new and exciting. Once all those experiences are had.....life slows down a bit and i think for most people i think that is the cause. The search for new and different experiences slows and maybe stops, causing stagnet thought processes..it could be as simple as a daily routine that does not change....whoch causes you not to change, and i think as humans we need a bit of change to keep us alive. So thank you youngins for keeping me changing ans especially , thank you A...for being such an A!

on the team

ok so last Friday we had a bit of a scare...i was off (oh joyous free day) and Preston took off as well and we were enjoying our morning, me drawing , Preston watching some scandalous documentary on E. The phone rang....Prestons mom got it downstairs and meekly called up for one of us to answer the phone.....it was the football coach, something had happened. For those who do not know Cortney is in football this year..which i think is awesome..hes going into 8th grade and already is taller than me..he rides his bike to practice every morning on his own ..hes really been responsable and mature about the whole thing. The coach said there was an accident and Cortney's arm was hurt, so Batman and Robin jump in the batmobile and off we go. I pull up to the practice field where the coach leads cortney to the side of the road...arm in sling wrapped in ice and bandage.
"He's still on the team" the coach says..." we tried to figure out what happened but i think someone just fell on it" he said "But he's still on the team".
We get Cortney in the car..wincing from the pain but not in tears, and Preston asks some queations" do you think its broken?"
"Oh yeah....i would say 60 % chance its broken......but hes still on the team"
ok im starting to giggle inside now cause hes crazy talkin now.
We figure out what to do about his bike and his stuff in his locker and go.
"still on the team!".....we hear faintly as we drove off.
In the car i tell him hes doing good for someone whos arm is broke...Cortney says it hurts but his cousin Jay's punches hurt more...funny.
Turns out it was just a minor fracture and he just has to wear a brace for a couple of weeks ..but no activity untill its healed which was a relief.... and hes still on the team.

Tiny scream

Well its done....after years of torment, nights of self conscience embarrasment, the pain ..the anguish..i finally got rid of the mole on my back. It was big....and it stuck out far enought to be a problem...........named my "space raisen" by some...the "source of my power" for others, i finally had enough, and made an appointment to see a dermatologist. After seeing a nurse...the girl she was training, the doctors assistant i finally saw the doctor.....or should i say Doogie Howser MD.
He looked at it and said .."yep we can take care of that".....thank god..i mean ......thats right you better bitch .
So the first nurse and her trainie came back in to numb me up....which i have no problem with ..needles are cool with me i can take the pain, yes im ok, i dont need to lie down. So the doctor enters with his assistant so now theres a "PARTY IN THE HOUSE!!!!" So now im in the room...the nurse..her trainie..the doctor...his assistant.....im kinda glad my mole is getting paris hilton like treatment.
So the doctor and his asst. proceed to ..gulp...saw it off with this tiny sterile..well... hack saw. Nope im fine, i dont need to lie down thanks just do something , chew this parasite off me already sheesh. When it was over they plopped it into a little cuppy thing to go on vacation to see if it was cancerous or whatever...they slapped some liquid on it to stop the bleeding, bandaged me up , and sent me on my way...as i walked away from the office i could have sworn there was a moment when they were sawing that i heard an almost inaudible tiny scream.